30 Minutes or Less Does Not Impress

Kenny Powers says "You're Effin Dead"

In 2009, director Ruben Fleischer struck gold when he directed the Action/Adventure-Comedy fusion film Zombieland. This summer, his latest attempt falls far short of his Zombie fame. 30 Minutes or Less is a story about a half-baked, sort of waste-of-a-life pizza delivery guy, Nick (Jesse Eisenberg), thrown into the world of hitmen, bank robberies, and car theft. He's forced to come up with $100,000 dollars in several hours at the hands of wanna-be criminal king Dwanye (the always hilarious but getting a bit stale Danny McBride).

Don't get me wrong, the movie is funny. Comedian and Parks and Recreation star Aziz Ansari does a great job of providing sparks of hilarity as Nick's buddy Chet who is along for the ride. There is something almost endearing and natural about the way Ansari delivers his polite, yet at times crude dialogue especially when its in juxtaposition to Eisenberg's frantic antics early on.

Speaking of Eisenberg, the guy has his moments that show you why he was an Academy Award Nominee. One rooftop scene in particular involving Eisenberg and his film's love interest, Kate (Dilshad Vadsaria), gives the film a break of the coarse language and jokes and replaces it with some straight up emotion and heart which, in my opinion, is what made Zombieland so good. It had the right balance of humor and zombie-gore mixed with in with scenes of real emotion. 30 Minutes or Less felt like it sought out to copy that formula but lost sight somewhere along the way. And not to knock Danny McBride (I love the guy and think he is hilarious), but I feel like audiences are going to be getting tired of the Kenny Powers persona he seems to be playing more frequently.

Insert some off the wall, inappropriate phrase

While many of the things he comes up with are hilarious, it just seems so repetitive. As does Nick Swardson's performance of an awkward sidekick. I had high hopes for this comedic duo as I think they are both equally talented performers in their own right. But together, it just seemed like the same old stuff.

The summer really has not been the greatest for original comedies and don't expect the tide to change with 30 Minutes or Less. It has its moments and will certainly get its share of laughs but don't rush to the theatre to catch it. Wait for it on Red-box where the movie, a bag of popcorn, and a couple of drinks will cost you 30 bucks or less to enjoy it.
       
FIVE STAR RATING: 2.5 out of 5

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Award For Best Trailer That Really Tells Me Nothing Goes To...

 
The Girl With The Dragon Tatto...I know this movie is based on the Stieg Larsson book which sadly I have yet to read, but the trailer got me super jacked even though I really have no idea what to make of it. What do you guys think? I'm thinking it's a whimsical family feature. That or a Rom-Com...

Rise of the Planet of the Apes Rises to the Occasion

Primate Power

I remember being twelve years old when I first caught a glimpse of the 1968 original Planet of the Apes on television. Instantly I was hooked. I don't know if it was the make-up effects that fascinated me or the sci-fi themed story that spiked my interest but I soon found myself owning all six of the series' films. In 2001, Tim Burton attempted to reboot the epic franchise with his Mark Wahlberg-led feature. Sadly there would be no good vibrations for Marky Mark and Mr. Burton as many critics and fans alike labeled the film as a huge disappointment. Don't worry Tim, I can't hold it against you. After all, you gave the world Danny Devito in the role he was born to play...

I mean, seriously. Who else could've done this?

Needless to say, when I first heard about the newest Apes reboot, I couldn't help but be excited. And while my expectations were low (CGI apes? James Franco? That kid who played Draco Malfloy in Harry Potter?), I had hoped that the film would at least be an entertaining couple of hours capped off with an epic showdown between people and primate. It was that and so much more.
 
What made this film so great was not the ground-breaking technology that transformed human actors into CGI-rendered apes (it is pretty amazing), but the surprising heart that the movie has. Rise is not only an origin story about how chimpanzees become a dominant force on our planet, it is a heart-warming tale (props to writers Rick Jaffa and Amanda Silver) about compassion, learning to let go, and it asks you to at least think about morality and humanity.

The driving force of the story is the incredibly intelligent ape Caesar played brilliantly by Andy Serkis. True you never see him in human form, but the emotion he brings to Caesar is nothing short of spectacular. I guarantee that you laugh and cry (ok maybe not cry but at least feel emotion) at the hands of the revolutionary ape.

 

Sweet Emotion

I really cannot talk enough about Serkis's performance. He has proven time and time again that an actor can have a strong impact on a film explicitly as an animated performer (he was Gollum in the Lord of the Rings films as well as Kong in King Kong), and in Rise he goes above and beyond. Without his strong emotion as Caesar the movie most likely would have been a colossal failure as the film looks to the ape to be its main protagonist. James Franco does a good enough job as scientist Will Rodman (no relation to The Worm) and shares some tender moments with Caesar as well as with his Alzheimer-infected father, played wonderfully by John Lithgow. And while some characters and story-lines seem recycled and unoriginal (David Oyelowo does a decent job but is still just a typical money-hungry CEO), the movie's central characters keep the ship sailing.

With its fresh story, breakthrough technology, and stellar performances Rise of the Planet of the Apes is a must-see movie before the summer concludes. If you haven't already seen it, stop monkeying around and get at it. If you have, consider giving it a second look. Filled with dozens of easter eggs calling back to the 1968 Charlton Heston original as well several gasp-inducing moments, it's a great ride worthy of another experience.

FIVE STAR RATING: 3.5 out of 5

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Welcome

Welcome to my first blog everyone. I plan on doing write-ups for new movies as well as new television shows debuting this upcoming Fall. Feel free to leave your comments or suggestions and don't forget to follow Five-Star!